In Which Jane Avril Pays Her Taxes

I know I have promised my readers the story of the second part of my first date with Amos Loewenstein. And that will come...tomorrow. But now, I want to write about the here and now, the present, April 2007. This morning, I, Jane Avril, went to see my "accountant" -- or rather, a little South Asian woman with a bindi who happened to be the only available "tax expert" at H&R Block when I walked in -- in order to pay my taxes. Or, in order to participate in the "legalized theft" from hard-working citizens by the government of Canada, as Pierre-Marie O'Reilly might say. Tax time is hell, not because I ever owe much (or even anything), but because it serves as a yearly reminder of how little I have accomplished, and how alone and desperate I am. Each year I am asked the same questions: "Are you still single?" Yes. "Do you still have no dependents?" Yes. "Are you still at the same address in that lousy neighbourhood you live in?" Yes. "Still self-employed/unemployed?" Yes. Yes. Yes.
It's appalling. The worst part has to be glancing around the waiting room at H&R Block, only to see your fellow denizens of the Dregs of HumanityLand, pathetic and hollow-eyed to a soul, hoping against all reason that tomorrow will be better. This morning I saw clearly the class of human I am lumped in with: "Artists," (i.e. drug addicts who can't hold down a job); the mentally ill; people in the Canadian film and television industry who are already subsidized by Canadian taxpayers such as myself, through the various Canada Council grants they are living off of so they can write their crappy scripts, and yet who will still -- undoubtedly -- get a substantial refund from all the money they didn't earn; students who are more than ten years younger than me and therefore have some justification for their pitiful circumstances (unlike me); the badly dressed, the badly groomed; the striving; the angry; the lonely.
Awful, just awful...but for one ray of hope.
I got some money back. The government of Canada owes me $17. Thank you, Stephen Harper. I know true fiscal conservatives and libertarians hate you, but I, Jane Avril, am a fan. Thanks to changes you have made to our tax code, I got $17 back. Of course, I had to pay the H&R Block lady $200 to process my file, but it's the principle.
Stephen Harper, you continue to have my vote.
And tomorrow, readers, the second part of my first date with Loewenstein. (Loewenstein, Loewenstein, Loewenstein...)